How to have the sex life you always dreamed of
Although regular sex is not in itself a good reason to commit to a relationship, it is still a huge advantage. But often, people get into relationships and find that sex is no longer regular. Sexual dissatisfaction can destroy relationships, but many of us are unable to verbalize what we want and are not having. But according to a massive study, sexual satisfaction is something quite simple: couples need to be willing to do everything.
Distributed in 2006 by Professor David Frederick of Chapman University, the sexual survey got responses from an astonishing 38,000 men and women, all of whom were previously involved in relationships in the last three years. The questions in the questionnaire dealt with deep issues such as the participants’ sexual relationships and life. In the end, a pattern emerged – sexually satisfied couples are open, both in the bedroom and outside. They are more likely to experiment with new positions, have spicy conversations, and even introduce sex toys during intercourse. More importantly, they have been more open to discussing their sexual needs with their partners.
Self-selection is a limiting factor in a study like this (the survey was posted on a popular website), so it may not be surprising to know that about one-third of respondents reported feeling satisfied with their current sex life as in the past. Nor will it be any surprise that frequent intercourse and more consistent orgasms are correlated with greater satisfaction. It seems then that greater sexual satisfaction is linked to greater overall satisfaction with the relationship. In fact, overall satisfaction with the relationship was considered to be the greatest factor in predicting greater sexual satisfaction for both men and women.
It’s important to remember that correlation and causality are two different things, and that simply adopting common behaviors among sexually satisfied couples is probably not the magic formula for your sex life – a little hair pulling is not going to knock your door below if everything else in the relationship is going by the barrel. Frederick admitted that even in the podcast of Dan Savage , but also added to try it costs.
“For dissatisfied couples, it’s something they can observe and say, ‘Why don’t we try this and see what happens,'” he said.
If you want to know more (and you should), you can read here the study in its entirety.
Sexually satisfied people are almost twice as likely to ask for something they want in bed when compared to dissatisfied people.