Have negative words slipped into your vocabulary? Everybody has bad days when their perspective feeds doom and gloom. Their speech and self-talk is pessimistic on these occasions, but they soon get over glumness. A problem arises when destructive language becomes second nature though. It damages self-esteem and stops people making the most of life. Note the checklist below to see If you can benefit from swapping unhelpful words for those that support well-belng.
The use of the words “Should” and “ought” is rampant. Klds are told they should behave in certain ways
and they ought to do what their parents tell them. The Idea you must do, say, or think correctly—whatever you may perceive that to be at the time—can lead to guilt and feelings of inadequacy.
When you note the words “should” or “ought” arise, ask yourself whether they are accurate. Do you genuinely need to phone your mother when you’re rushed off your feet carrying out chores, for instance? Or would it be better to phone when you have time to give her your full attention and ejoy chatting?
You can’t do some things, but much of the time you use “can’t” inappropriately. Doing so dents your confidence and holds back your success. Often the word “can’t” may be swapped with “I am if I practice” or “pethaps I can if l try.”
Think before you say “I can’t.” Ask yourself whether you need more information, support, or training rather than insisting you aren’t able to do something.
Not good enough:
The concept you aren’t good enough may arise as a thought. Or, you might say you aren’t tdented, attractive, or ” enough” during conversations in some other way.
Believing you are inadequate sets the bar low—you won’t branch out if you think there’s no point. At the same time, not bellevlng you are enough will make you unhappy and you’ll compare yourself unfavorably to other people.
Challenge the words “not enough” when they come up in communication or pop into your head. Ask yourself when the notion first appeared in your life. A memory might spring to mind of an event when you were a kid during which you were told, or felt, you weren’t enough.
Contesting the inaccurate data you’ve picked up can help to rewire you brain. Look at how you misinterpreted events or were handed the idea you were inadequate. Reallze your belief stems from erroneous information.
I always fail/get this wrong:
The words “I always fail” or “get this wrong” are comnon. They stop people believing in themselves and recognizing how much they can achieve. Often, they slip into conversations without recognition and lower people’s confidence.
Counter the idea you ‘always” make mistakes or fail. Are you unsuccessful every time? Plus, who do you measure yourself against? Maybe they have more experience than you. Give yourself the chance to improve by swapping these unhelpful words with “sometimes I get this right” or “With a little more practice, I’ll be good at this.”
It’s no use:
When you say “It’s no use,” you give-up, often before trying. These words signify you have no belief in yourself to achieve success or in anyone else’s ability to help you accomplish your goals.
Brainstorm ideas that challenge the thought something can’t be done. Think about what you can do to make reaching your goal possible. How must circumstances change for you to do what you want to do?
You can change your mindset now by thinking about how you will react when the words mentioned would normally arise. Consider how to respond differently when you meet challenges that usually pre-empt negativity. Repeat helpful responses often and you will rewire your brain. Soon, you will automatically use positive self-talk and speech and your confidence will grow.